Internalizando música de banda: hombres enamorados, hombres despechados

Creciendo en México, caminando por las calles de tierra y adoquín, a diario escuchaba música de banda resonando desde los estéreos de mis vecinos. Lo que es conocido como Regional Mexicano, junto con sus sub-géneros geográficos y experimentales, es muy común entre las comunidades donde he crecido. Escuchar ese tipo de música no siempre fue algo que hacia por voluntad propia. El estereotipo de llamar a ese genero "música agropecuaria" lamentablemente me enganchó por un buen tiempo, y por risas y deseos de encajar en las atmosferas musicales con preferencias blancas y/o euro centristas, ignoré la música regional de mi propio país por la mayor parte de mi vida.

Recientemente, diría que hace unos seis o siete años, comencé a escuchar música regional mexicana de nuevo, pero esta vez por mi propia cuenta, y he encontrado muchas canciones que me encantan (la mayoria románticas, obvio). Cabe mencionar que me estoy refiriendo al genero moderno, de los años 2000 en adelante. Hace poco pude poner en palabras algo que había estado rebotando en mi cabeza desde hacia ya un buen tiempo, pero me sentía limitada en como lo podia expresar.

Personalmente, yo aprendí a amar en español. Mi afecto lo expreso en este idioma, y hasta hoy no he salido con alguien (románticamente) que no haya sido hispanohablante debido a mi nivel de comodidad en compartir mis sentimientos en un idioma con el cual crecí. Pero (siempre hay un pero), también noto que el coraje, el despecho, el enojo, todo eso fluye mejor en español. Al darme cuenta de esto, pensé en la temática de este blogpost. Desafortunadamente, un catalizador de estas ideas fue el numero rampante de casos de feminicidios y violencia hacia las mujeres en México y en el mundo. Es algo confuso que la actitud violenta de los hombres, en aspectos físicos, emocionales y verbales, es tan normalizada que no nos da vergüenza escucharla en música, porque esta puesta en palabras que ya escuchamos o leemos en nuestra vida diaria.

Con todas las emociones que se expresan en música de banda, he notado que las mas fuertes son el amor y el despecho, con las palabras usadas en las letras para aplicárselas a las mujeres recipientes de esas emociones.

Y no es solo en aspectos de popularidad, pero quizá también en como afectan a quienes escuchamos esa música y lo que nos conlleva a normalizar (como mencioné previamente, a lo que estamos expuestas a diario). Queremos las emociones fuertes de un hombre enamorado, que nos diga que lo hacemos sentir como si estuviera "embrujado" y que es capaz de seguirnos hasta con los ojos vendados (K-Paz de la Sierra) porque así es como las mujeres comúnmente amamos a alguien. Aunque noto que eso pasa menos seguido que los aspectos negativos de lo que hablo aquí. Sé que no hablo por mi misma, pero en el otro extremo de estas emociones estan los hombres despechados haciendo música y no quiero tener nada que ver con ese tipo de comportamiento. Hombres cantándoles a las mujeres sobre como no eran nada antes de estar involucradas con ellos, sobre sus infidelidades en forma de venganza, deseándoles la muerte a sus exes, y muchas cosas mas. Sé que estarán pensando, «pero es solo una canción», y sí, son solo canciones, pero pienso mucho en las personas que crecen normalizando estas reacciones de un hombre dolido, y en como se nos dice desde pequeñas cuando escuchamos a nuestros compañeros cantarnos a todo pulmón, "déjalo, es solo un niño", "solamente esta cantando", etc.


No tengo una conclusion formal a esto, ya que es mas una reflexión a las ideas sobre como normalizamos el comportamiento de personajes masculinos* en la música transmitido a los oyentes. Es una conversación que me gustaría seguir teniendo con otras personas, y escuchar sus ideas y detalles que han notado en este genero y en otros géneros musicales. Me gusta el amor a la mexicana, con el corazón en la mano y los buenos sentimientos expuestos, que cada parte del cuerpo se sienta atraída a la otra persona, pero el saber que tanto mensaje de despecho ha estado filtrándose a través de la música, me deja un mal sabor de boca.

*nótese que me refiero a los personajes y al vocabulario usado en cierta música, no a quienes las cantan, ya que no trato de hacer un ataque a su persona, sino un análisis.

Critical Thinking is not "Looking for Reasons to Complain"

Recently I was in class discussing the essay "The Cruel Spectacle of ‘The Whale'" by Roxane Gay on the film (you guessed it) The Whale. Our professor divided us all into groups and told us to dissect Gay's remarks and analysis. The goal of the group discussion was to identify what Gay was trying to convey, since her thesis wasn't plainly stated but rather spread through the paragraphs. Personally I thought it was less of an essay with heavy focus on a specific thesis that she wanted to argue and prove points for (like an argumentative essay) and more of a think piece, with stream of consciousness and reactive descriptions.


My group mates were analyzing the word choice, the fact that Gay mentions there were only four fat people in the audience when she watched the film, the alleged intent of the director, the self-destructive tendencies and what it means to a society that doesn't take you seriously if you're not good looking. It wasn't only my group who had some good things to point out and fact check, but I heard the other people around me as they spoke. I won't lie, that point about not being taken seriously unless a person is good-looking was an interesting point and I'd love to read more about that, since younger generations have noticed it and labeled it as "pretty privilege." Then, someone else in my class joined in on the discussion and with the full weight of his chest and a sourly disdainful tone said:


"She's just looking for reasons to complain about the movie."


Let's analyze this, shall we? This "she" was Roxane Gay, but he couldn't even bother to mention the writer's name. This was after seeing that Roxane is a fat, Black woman, who is part of the LGBT+ community. I should mention here, because you deserve to know more about this man that does not want to know more about anything that requires thought, that this young man is a known racist and bigot in the classes that I've had the misfortune of taking with him. He is known to be dismissive of women's work, to speak over women who participate in class and try to pass it off as a joke or with some sarcastic tones. Think, the man that calls women "females" rather than women or by their actual name.


As another non-thin, Black woman, part of the LGBT+ community, his remark and behavior to the thoughts of Roxane Gay were another addition to the pile of rubble that he has made with his other racist remarks and behaviors towards authors and themes we have seen.


Why does thinking critically give him the impression that Gay and we, as students, are just looking for things to complain? Because when we read Gay's work, see what she is thinking, then that pushes us to think as a chain reaction. I think that his perception of being "critical" is more about criticizing and complaining about every detail, and not about taking things apart and analyzing them one by one. 


Instead of taking a step back and trying to make connections between what Gay analized, and how that can be seen in society, and maybe even taking it a step further and reflecting, "Hmm, how does this essay make me think about the state of the world?" he closed up his brain. Even by pointing out how he isn't affected by the negative aspects of The Whale that Gay points out would have been more valuable, because that would've opened another door for discussion. Instead he gave us no thoughts, no attempt to learn from what people were sharing (even from perspectives different from that of Gay, although well-thought and researched). Let me make this clear: even if you don't agree with essays like this, it's okay to still approach them as someone who wants to learn. Don't worry, nothing will eat you alive if you interact with different content; scholars do it all the time.


The interaction left a bad taste in my mouth. A white, racist, young man, unwilling to listen to the opinion of a scholar who looks very different from him, and unwilling to provide well-thought comments in an academic setting.


Critical thinking is about analysis; why did Gay point out the amount of fat individuals in the movie viewing; how many fat people were asked about the perception of their bodies before the film was made; what was the reason that pretty privilege was even brought up in the essay (Gay doesn't call it pretty privilege, but we now know that's what it is). 
Thinking critically and developing exploration of a topic is not "looking for reasons to complain." It's about consuming the content, taking it apart piece by piece, and considering the why's and the purposes. Just like Gay did with the film The Whale, we should do with the media we consume--films, books, essays, whatever it is. We don't necessarily need to write essays about everything (but if you do, let me know, I'd love to read your essays), we just need to think what else is below the surface level.